Saturday, May 30, 2009

Could they be...

So, my hubby and I were driving home the other day (sans Eduardo) when he asked me "If KStew (yes... he really called her that) and Rob are together and they break up wont that hurt the movie?" I said "I don't think they are really together. " (Enough said, right?... WRONG!)

When I was in the shower I got to thinking (oh, no... panic has set in) about "what if they are together?" My brain starts working a mile a minute...they could be, no they couldn't, could they?...Then I remembered these pics (above) that I saw and had to re-look at them. Maybe they do look like they like each other (well she seems totally into him at the very least)... (Then I am off).."What if they break up, oh no, what will happen to Edward and Bella will they ever be together? Is there no hope for love in the real world." (That knocked me back into the world of reality) Edward and Bella are fake...he is a vampire (a beautiful, wonderful, lovely, smart, ...) which means who cares if they are together, yeah it makes for great publicity whether they are or not, but I want Rob/Edward for myself not her. (Geez, what sick masochistic world do we live in where women want their dream man to hook up with another woman?) I dont know I think my brain is being overtaken by the world of Twilight and I dont know what is real and fake anymore (I place full blame on Stephanie Meyer). Well, at least I still have my friend Eduardo...(Oh shit, something is definitely wrong with me.)

Friday, May 29, 2009

Just when you thought it couldn't get worse...

Stop burning holes in my skin with your freak!

This little gem comes along. I mean seriously this is so Creeptastic. The one good thing I can say about this is that it is on paper (computer) not someone's arm (check a few posts down). Let's really look at this image (calling it a picture sounds too nice) really just creeps me out. He looks so scary ugly that I feel the need to not make eye contact. And what is the deal with the dove and it's death wish..."watch out stupid bird he is "vegetarian" he will eat your ass". You know it isn't everyday that you stroll along some vampire just kickin it in the woods,being intellectual. Eduardo and I were thinking this douche bags pants are messed up... way more that Eduardo's are (notice Action Figure Edward's butt seam). Maybe these are special "vampire pants" and they don't need zippers or buttons. Wait I got it, this guy wears sweatpants...he is a lazy vampire. This is the kind of guy your parents warn you about..."Now honey, if you ever come across some man in the forest reading by moonlight, run, don't walk, as fast as you can". Well, I guess there is only one thing left to do...tear up the picture, grab your lighters (matches, flame throwers, torches, Molotov cocktails) and burn that motherfucker...What? it is the only way to kill a vampire...right?

P.S.- To whom it may concern: Sorry I had to shit on your...artwork?

Happy Birthday, human!

Happy Birthday to human, Justin Chon. Eduardo and I were just talking (ok I was talking, Eduardo was just staring off, again.I wonder if he has some sort of attention deficit disorder...) about how we hope Justin chillaxes on his birthday. Maybe we will send him a bucket of worms. Anyhoo just wanted to say that.

P.S. - Bring your own compost tea!!!

Thursday, May 28, 2009

What did they do to him?...

First, I would like to preface this post with this: I love Robert Pattinson.

I am not trying to be a bitch but...what is going on here. This angle looks so weird. I mean seriously I was trying to get over it and stop thinking about it (but realistically these pics are hard to avoid, especially when you are looking for them), but I cant. Every time I see this pic I hear Beyonce's Song "Crazy in Love". Here is the video at You Tube... at the 1:09 mark you will see what I mean. The pic makes him look like he has major junk in his trunk. Only like 2 pics are like this, so that is why I think it is the angle, but seriously why would you do that to my man. Maybe now that I have got this out in the open I hope I can get past it. I dont know...Maybe I need a knew hobby.

Feast of Love...has nothing to do with Rob

That being said..A couple weeks ago my Netflix queue was getting pretty low so I decided to just add anything to it. Well, yesterday I received my newest rental entitled "Feast of Love". Now, I couldn't tell you anything about this movie except that it had Selma Blair and Morgan Freeman in it (not really the best selling points, but hey). So, there Eduardo and I are watching this when it gets into some sex scenes (I swear I saw Eduardo blush, then I remembered he a) is a vampire and b) is plastic)...Well, during this one scene I focused on the guy because he looked somewhat familiar...and guess who it was...Bella's dad, Charlie Swan. Yes, Billy Burke was doing the nasty multiple times in this flick. Every time I saw him all I could think was..."Yes, chief Swan" or "Be careful...I always am". (Poor Eduardo, I rushed to cover his eyes...but too late.) Billy doesn't have the mustache and he looks so young, even though this film is only a few years old. In the movie he plays a married man who is having an affair, he also ends up smacking the bitch up (no wonder Renee left his ass, lol). Movie was ok (if you don't mind heartbreak, death, divorce, etc). Now, I must tend to Eduardo since his eyes have been burning ever since seeing his father-in-law bucking down on some chick.

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

Who has it better...?

Oh, to be those hands...

I was looking through all the pics of my man shooting his scenes and got to thinking...yeah Kstew gets to hug him, and kiss him, and, well, basically molest him but she doesnt seem to take any joy in it. But I think the real winner is the big guy that gets to hold onto Edward/Rob! I mean seriously I would never let go...EVER! And you know he walked away from that a happy man because then he gets to tell all the ladies how he got to hold onto Edwards butt take after take after take. Oh, to be that mans hands!!!



So, I have been sitting here,while my daughter beats Eduardo to a plastic pulp, thinking about what I wanted to talk about...when this magnificent picture shows up. Wow...I have never really seen a picture of Edward/Rob with his shirt off, and now I can die a happy woman. Jesus Christ that man is beautiful!!! *sigh*

Tuesday, May 26, 2009


What the Fuck?

I was thinking that posting this pic would be enough... but really? I think we need to talk about it (or at least I need to give my opinion). So, lets first think about what was going on in this person's life to get them to do this to their body...Here is a little multiple choice to help you out.
A) Really drunk
B) Really high
C) Really stupid
D) all the above
Hmmmm...yeah that about sums it up. Now, I will admit everything aside from the monstrosity they are calling Edward looks good, but really when all you can look at is that face (and not really by choice) you cant even see the rest. Poor thing. Actually, I was really taking it in (not that it can be missed) and Edward's nose is very bulbous...wouldn't you say? Can you imagine getting older and having sagging skin...One day it is Edward(in your mind...that is) the next you are sporting the elephant man in a forest on your arm. Shit, someone is going to pay for that one (and it isn't going to be me...this time)!!

A Day in the Life of a Fan Mom

So, I woke up this morning thinking about my day and what it holds for me, and thought I would show you guys what "A Day in the Life (or lack there of) of a Fan Mom" was like.

1) First things first wake my daughter in my face telling me she needs to pee pee and poo poo in the potty...over and over, while being about 2cm from my face. Nice,right?

2) Get her something to eat and drink as well as put on a show for her (and make sure it is all enough to hold her attention so she doesn't bother me while I catch up on my Rob gossip)

3) Go to laptop and go through countless blogs, celebrity gossip pages, and message boards. All in hopes of seeing my beloved Rob.

4) Eventually lunch roles around (sooner than I expected but I guess that happens when you read fan fic. I assumed the world stopped while I was ignoring it, hmmm note to self: it doesn't) so I make my daughter food and while she is eating check the sites, again.

5) Then my daughter decides it would be fun to play with Eduardo. So they have a tea party...then she carries him around in her bucket, lets the dog play with him (all while giving him kisses), pushes him in a stroller, all that fun stuff...(ahh to be young and that be the fun stuff, lol)

6) Rescue Eduardo from my daughter as he is about to learn to swim in the toilet(which might have been OK if her father hadn't left it full of piss) Geez, men...I bet Edward would never do that.

7) NAP TIME! Great now I can visit the blogs again, just in case I missed something or they updated in the last 10 minutes. I have about 2 hours of uninterrupted Rob time.

8) She's up...alert, alert...hide Eduardo...get her snack...put on show...keep reading one of the 4 fan fic's I am into.

9) Start getting dinner ready for hubby (who am I kidding he can make something for us when he gets home) keep reading fan fic, blogs, etc
10) Hubby puts daughter in bath gets her ready for bed while I relax from my hard day and read my blogs, again.

11)Finally, she is asleep and I go off to watch Twilight, again!

Now I know what some of you might be thinking... and I want you to know that I am very present in my daughters life...I change her diapers, feed her, put shows on for her, and I sit on the couch in the same room all day with her. Plus, Eduardo knows what she likes so he helps out when she isn't putting his life in danger (swimming in pee, climbing the mountains in the liter box, crashing his head through glass windows, etc.)

Monday, May 25, 2009

Happy Memorial Day!

Alright, So today is Memorial Day and what better way to thank the men and women who have died for us than a pic of the hot guys from Twilight, right?...Exactley what I was thinking! So, here they are for your veiwing pleasure (or mine not sure who I really posted this for).

Sunday, May 24, 2009

First Blog...Ever!

Disclaimer: This will get better.

That being said...this is my first post to the new blog and I definitely needed some help. I figured there was only one person I could count on to help me through this. Well, Eduardo to the rescue(I thought)!So, we sat (he stood, turns out he doesn't need to sit that much) and well, to be honest he didn't offer me any help. He just stood there staring at the screen. So here I am alone trying to figure out what to write about. I got it...nothing for now. I will post when I have something to say.